on projects and pursuits and passions
Last week I found myself filling out an online adoption application at PAWS. I pressed send and then stopped to think. No. I'm just not ready. The very next day, I was researching the best place to acquire a budgie. Or should I get two?
I finally screamed STOP. When and if the time is right, when and if I am ready, there will always be cats that need a nice home. And this mad search to fill the hole in my heart is definitely not the right time.
So, I turned my attentions to projects I've been meaning to do. And Saturday was a good day. I got a lot accomplished: framing projects of art from friends, rearranging furniture now that there is a bit less in my flat, sorting my cameraless photography and polaroids into archival boxes, dusting, cleaning, cooking. I even managed a haircut, the first since last September. I found amazing treasures (and photo props) for under fifteen dollars at my favourite resale shop. I fell asleep, exhausted, before nine p.m.
Today, I am snapping polaroids for Polaroid Week and making a cyanotype and a lumen. Later, I will prepare one of my favourite quick and tasty meals.
It's actually a beautiful day today: sunny, 15C (60F) and almost windless. I have my $5 ticket for the Vintage Garage Sale opening day, but I’m taking a pass to just enjoy my little flat. I'll go next month. Besides, I may find things I never knew I had to have. Like additions for my salt and pepper collection. Or old pillowcases and tablecloths. Or kitchen tools, costume jewelry, and vintage cameras. I can manage wasting the five dollars, rather than spending money I really shouldn't. Not to mention the crowd of people. I can feel my anxiety rise.
In other words, I am keeping busy. It is how I mourn. It’s how I continue. It's how I stay balanced. Or as close to balanced as I can manage, even in the most ideal of times.
Happy Earth Day, y’all!
I finally screamed STOP. When and if the time is right, when and if I am ready, there will always be cats that need a nice home. And this mad search to fill the hole in my heart is definitely not the right time.
So, I turned my attentions to projects I've been meaning to do. And Saturday was a good day. I got a lot accomplished: framing projects of art from friends, rearranging furniture now that there is a bit less in my flat, sorting my cameraless photography and polaroids into archival boxes, dusting, cleaning, cooking. I even managed a haircut, the first since last September. I found amazing treasures (and photo props) for under fifteen dollars at my favourite resale shop. I fell asleep, exhausted, before nine p.m.
Today, I am snapping polaroids for Polaroid Week and making a cyanotype and a lumen. Later, I will prepare one of my favourite quick and tasty meals.
It's actually a beautiful day today: sunny, 15C (60F) and almost windless. I have my $5 ticket for the Vintage Garage Sale opening day, but I’m taking a pass to just enjoy my little flat. I'll go next month. Besides, I may find things I never knew I had to have. Like additions for my salt and pepper collection. Or old pillowcases and tablecloths. Or kitchen tools, costume jewelry, and vintage cameras. I can manage wasting the five dollars, rather than spending money I really shouldn't. Not to mention the crowd of people. I can feel my anxiety rise.
In other words, I am keeping busy. It is how I mourn. It’s how I continue. It's how I stay balanced. Or as close to balanced as I can manage, even in the most ideal of times.
Happy Earth Day, y’all!
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| cyanotype 2 Outside about two and a half hours. Terrain Eco-Friendly Water Colour Paper, photoactive, made in USA No adjustments. ©Trish Korous |
it's balanced, trish. a little bit of time to enjoy other things.
ReplyDeleteand yes, when you're ready. and you'll know when.
I hope so, Susan. Thank you.
Delete